For just being on the Phone.

TAKE A LOOK : ( and you would find out the same ..!!!! )

1) Tech Support : "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."
Customer : "Ok."
Tech Support : "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
Customer : "No."
Tech Support : "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up
Customer : "No."
Tech Support : "Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up
until this point?"
Customer : "Sure, you told me to write 'click' and I wrote

------------ --------- --------- --------- -

2) Customer : "I received the software update you sent, but I am still
getting the same error message."
Tech Support : "Did you install the update?"
Customer : "No. Oh, am I supposed to install it to get it to work?"

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --

3) Customer : "I'm having trouble installing Microsoft Word."
Tech Support : "Tell me what you've done."
Customer : "I typed 'A: SETUP'."
Tech Support : "Ma'am, remove the disk and tell me what it
Customer : "It says '[PC manufacturer] Restore and Recovery
Tech Support : "Insert the MS Word setup disk."
Customer : "What?"
Tech Support : "Did you buy MS word?"
Customer : "No..."

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --

4) Customer : "Do I need a computer to use your software?"
Tech Support : ?!%#$ (welll pretend to smile)

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --

5) Tech Support : "Ok, in the bottom left hand side of the screen,
can you see the 'OK' button displayed?"
Customer : "Wow. How can you see my screen from there?"
Tech support : ##### ***

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --

6) Tech Support : "What type of computer do you have?"
Customer : "A white one."
Tech support : ******_____# ###

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --

7) Tech Support : "What operating system are you running?"
Customer : "Pentium."
Tech support : ////-----+++
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --

8) Customer : "My computer's telling me I performed an illegal
Tech support : ??????

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --

9) Customer : "I have Microsoft Exploder."
Tech Support : ?!%#$
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --

10) Customer : "How do I print my voicemail?"
Tech support : ??????

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --

11) Customer : "You've got to fix my computer. I urgently need to
print document, but the computer won't boot properly."

Tech Support : "What does it say?"
Customer : "Something about an error and non-system disk."
Tech Support : "Look at your machine. Is there a floppy
Customer : "No, but there's a sticker saying there's an Intel
Tech support : @@@@@
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --

12) Tech Support: "Just call us back if there's a problem. We're open
24 hours."
Customer : "Is that Eastern time?"

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --

13) Tech Support : "What does the screen say now?"
Customer : "It says, 'Hit ENTER when ready'."
Tech Support : "Well?"
Customer : "How do I know when it's ready?"
Tech support : *** ---- ++++
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --

The best of the lot

14) A plain computer illiterate guy rings tech support to report that
his computer is faulty.

Tech: What's the problem?
User: There is smoke coming out of the power supply.
Tech: (keep quite)
Tech: You'll need a new power supply.
User: No, I don't! I just need to change the startup files.
Tech: Sir, the power supply is faulty. You'll need to replace it.
User: No way! Someone told me that I just needed to change the
startup and it will fix the problem! All I need is for you to tell me the
Tech support::

10 minutes later, the User is still adamant that he is right. The
tech is frustrated and fed up.

Tech support::(hush hush)
Tech: Sorry, Sir. We don't normally tell our customers this, but
there is an undocumented DOS command that will fix the problem.
User: I knew it!
Tech : Just add the line LOAD NOSMOKE.COM at the end of the
CONFIG.SYS. Let me know how it goes.

10 minutes later.

User : It didn't work. The power supply is still smoking.
Tech : Well, what version of DOS are you using?
User : MS-DOS 6.22.
Tech : That's your problem there. That version of DOS didn't
come with NOSMOKE. Contact Microsoft and ask them for a patch that will give you
the file. Let me know how it goes.

1 hour later.

User : I need a new power supply.
Tech support : How did you come to that conclusion?
Tech support : (hush hush)
User : Well, I rang Microsoft and told him about what you said,
and he started asking questions about the make of power supply.
Tech: Then what did he say?
User: He told me that my power supply isn't compatible with

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- -

Height Of it all (Too Good)

15) Customer : I need a product identification number right now
Customer Care Officer : and may I help u in finding it out?
Cust : sure !!!!
CCO : could u left click on start and do u find 'My Computer'?
Cust: I did left click but how the hell do I find your


Author: praveen01 Aug 2008 Member Level: Bronze   Points : 1

nice jokes......really , i have experienced such kinda customers in real life as well :( i wonder , y do they get to computers .....

Author: Raghav02 Aug 2008 Member Level: Gold   Points : 2

Thank you Praveen.
Hope you liked the jokes. Even I have experienced such a kind of customers. Really it is amazing why such people get to computers. In fact there are such a kind of customers even now. Anyway thank you for reading the jokes.


Author: SuganyaCMR02 Aug 2008 Member Level: Gold   Points : 0


Nice jokes

Author: Raghav02 Aug 2008 Member Level: Gold   Points : 1

Hi Siva Sankari,
Thank you very much. Hope you find the resources at dotnetspider very useful to you. If you have any suggestions and feedback about dotnetspider, feel free to contact us.

Raghav Kumar
Web Master

Author: Gaurav Aroraa03 Aug 2008 Member Level: Gold   Points : 2


Nice one. Keep it up. The way you have represented is very nice.

Author: Arun Kumar04 Aug 2008 Member Level: Gold   Points : 2

Superb jokes
my goodness am not a call center guy..

But i heard from my friends that they too faced these tragedies. :)

Especially for American supports and for Microsoft's... :)

Author: Srikanth05 Aug 2008 Member Level: Bronze   Points : 0

ha haha .
cool man

Author: srinivas13 Aug 2008 Member Level: Silver   Points : 0

Very interesting one,nice to read such type of jokes.

Author: Anil Kumar Pandey13 Aug 2008 Member Level: Diamond   Points : 1


thanks God we are not a Call center employeee

i m happy as a developer

Author: Raghav13 Aug 2008 Member Level: Gold   Points : 1

Thank you Anil Pandey
for your response. YOU can also start participating actively in our site and grow your self alongwith the growth of the website.


  • Do not include your name, "with regards" etc in the comment. Write detailed comment, relevant to the topic.
  • No HTML formatting and links to other web sites are allowed.
  • This is a strictly moderated site. Absolutely no spam allowed.
  • Name: